HEAVAGE: Breasts so big they need a special bra for support
IRRITAINMENT: TV shows and celebs so irritating or bad that they end up being compulsive viewing for all the wrong reasons.
BLAMESTORMING: Getting in a group, discussing why something went wrong and then deciding whose fault it was.
SMIRTING: Flirting between tobacco addicts forced outside by the public smoking ban.
FLEXTING: Flirting through mobile phone texts.
MOBISODE: A clip of a full-length TV show or film made for watching on a mobile phone or MP4 player.
WOOF: Stands for Well Off Old Fogey : the sort a gold-digger goes for.
CHINDIA: The combination of China and India as a major economic force.
OH-NO-SECOND: That minuscule fraction of time when you realise you’ve just made a huge mistake.
NONEBRITY: Someone who ends up a minor celebrity despite having no obvious talent.
SWIPEOUT: The moment your debit card is swiped at a till and you find you’ve run out of
cash. Also used to describe the magnetic strip on a card becoming worn out through overuse.
SINBAD: Stands for Single Income, No Boyfriend And Desperate.
MOUSE POTATO: A modern version of a couch potato. Someone who spends all their time at home surfing the internet.
PLAY-DOUGH: Money set aside for a night on the town.
BROMANCE: When two heterosexual lads are such good mates they spend as much time together as a couple.
SCUMMY MUMMY: The opposite of a scrummy mummy.
PROBO: Someone who makes a tidy living from begging. A professional hobo.
TURDBIRD: Someone who flies into a situation, slags it off then goes away again. Like a negative know-it-all.
SAGA LOUTS: Groups of tea-drinking pensioners who travel to garden centres and craft fairs on organised coach trips.
PIKEA: An open-air area such as a lay-by where people dump old furniture.
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